Brit here, married to a German, kids all born and bred in UK, but have dual citizenship, so, post-Brexit, decided to up sticks and get a German (EU) passport for me, the useless non-EU one. And because we want to live one day in a European country where the sun shines more than it does in Manchester…not too difficult an ask.
And, though I’ve been coming to Germany several times a year for the past 30-odd years, living here in Berlin has still presented me with a few small shocks I wasn’t expecting.
1. The bureaucracy.
2. The bureaucracy.
3. The bureaucracy…I’ll stop there on this one…for I could go on and on and on…
4. The cultural differences my wife, who’s lived in the UK for over 30 years, describes as ‘a cultural difference, but I call rudeness. Just not like home, where we apologise when someone steps on our foot…ha-ha. No chance of anyone here apologising for that at all!
5. The general sense of impatience all Germans seem to have about and with everything. I read somewhere that Germans don’t drive to be safe, they drive to prove they are right, and that’s about as much of a nutshell when it comes to describing them.
6. Their complete lack of tact. Nonexistent here, so if you’re harbouring a spade, be prepared to get called out on it here!
But, and this is a very big but, I think life here is better than it is Manchester, or anywhere else in the UK, so Incan only imagine how much better it is, in theory, than it is in the US.
But, and this is a bigger but than the last one, the language is a bugger. Much harder than I anticipated, and I’m resigned to not being able to express myself in German as well as I do in English, which was, believe it or not, a delusion I harboured for quite a while. But, with hard work and application, I know I’ll get close to an approximation of someone who speaks the lingo well. I think…
And, finally, I love living in Berlin. Not Germany, for Berlin most definitely is not Germany, but Berlin. It is one of the world’s great cities, and should be on anybody’s list as a must-see place, and, if you can, try living here, even if only for a while.
We went through all of this to work at my husband‘s headquarters in Kassel, only for my children and him to not like it and want to come home. I could have stayed forever and every time we go to the doctor or I go grocery shopping I let him know. When we go to Michigan instead of Paris, I let him know. I didn’t even mind everything being closed on Sunday.
Moving to Germany is my secret fear… 😂. I have been married to a German for 25 years but we have lived that entire time in Switzerland so I have zero claim to citizenship (although I bore a German son!). As a Swiss citizen now I would at least get some preferential treatment if we would settle across the border— unlike in the 90s when, as an American, I could not get residency in Germany with a freelance journalist’s contract. I guess I still harbor a grudge!
It depends where you are. In Bavaria/Baden Wuerttemberg, it's general not a long wait. I also have access to several regular doctors if I want to, and can usually get an appointment the same or the next day. For a knee operation, I waited 2 weeks. I got a fancy knee-exercise machine for 6 weeks post-op, a complex knee brace and physio therapy for 12 weeks, all paid for by my health insurance. I can go to the dentist any day, most regular interventions are covered, and the amount I have to pay for things like root canals, crowns, is very reasonable. My bifocal glasses here cost around 500 Euros compared to $1500 CAN I paid for my previous glasses in Canada. There are countless low-cost sports clubs for kids, and yes, the 'Vereine" where youth and kids can do stuff they are interested in.
Germans have high expectations of each other, and generally people strive to meet them. They are often extremely conscientious and try their best to not inconvenience anyone and expect the same from others. Being self-sufficient is really important, to the point of some Germans seeming cold and uncaring about your specific situation. But once they warmed up to you, in other words, once you have proven to them over a longish period of time that you are also meeting those expectaions of honourability, self-sufficiency and are possessing the fine skill of reading between the lines (or into the silences during conversation) and are also fun to be around, they will generously help you however they can. Most Germans seem to have a pretty good bullshit detector though, so you can't pretend to be someone you are not. They don't put any stock in self-presentation. Talking excitedly about your wins will only seem like bragging to them. Understatement proves you are trustworthy. Braggers can't keep secrets, might look flighty or not very smart. Anyhow, just my 2 cents worth:)
For specialists, yes. I am not sure if that is more of a Berlin-specific thing, because there is a shortage of doctors-particularly specialists-here. Many of them are older and there aren't enough younger ones showing up to take their place. The same is true of teachers.
We haven't had to wait long to schedule an appointment with our Hauzarzt (primary care doctor) and then all primary care doctors are required to have Sprechstunde, set hours of the day when they take unscheduled urgent appointments.
And, thinking more about it, I should have included something about the health system, since it operates differently than many Americans expect. I will probably do a whole post about this later. But the short version: There is universal coverage. You are required by law to have health insurance and you pay a premium based on your income. You can choose between the public plan that everyone can get, or applying for and paying extra for private health insurance.
Having private insurance will mean that you may be able to get an appointment faster and there are more doctors who will take it.
Even though I don't plan to move to Germany I am finding these insights fascinating. I thought Berlin was digital nomad-friendly but I guess it's more likely to be towards EU citizens who don't require a digital nomad visa? I also feel slightly relieved that here in Ireland apart from specialist medical appointments you don't have waiting lists. Still, even in Ireland there's a lot that can be improved. Congratulations on building a new life in Germany and glad your family has settled in well!
I have EI citizenship but struggle to find traction applying to international jobs. Any chance you have advice on how to source open positions?
EU
Brit here, married to a German, kids all born and bred in UK, but have dual citizenship, so, post-Brexit, decided to up sticks and get a German (EU) passport for me, the useless non-EU one. And because we want to live one day in a European country where the sun shines more than it does in Manchester…not too difficult an ask.
And, though I’ve been coming to Germany several times a year for the past 30-odd years, living here in Berlin has still presented me with a few small shocks I wasn’t expecting.
1. The bureaucracy.
2. The bureaucracy.
3. The bureaucracy…I’ll stop there on this one…for I could go on and on and on…
4. The cultural differences my wife, who’s lived in the UK for over 30 years, describes as ‘a cultural difference, but I call rudeness. Just not like home, where we apologise when someone steps on our foot…ha-ha. No chance of anyone here apologising for that at all!
5. The general sense of impatience all Germans seem to have about and with everything. I read somewhere that Germans don’t drive to be safe, they drive to prove they are right, and that’s about as much of a nutshell when it comes to describing them.
6. Their complete lack of tact. Nonexistent here, so if you’re harbouring a spade, be prepared to get called out on it here!
But, and this is a very big but, I think life here is better than it is Manchester, or anywhere else in the UK, so Incan only imagine how much better it is, in theory, than it is in the US.
But, and this is a bigger but than the last one, the language is a bugger. Much harder than I anticipated, and I’m resigned to not being able to express myself in German as well as I do in English, which was, believe it or not, a delusion I harboured for quite a while. But, with hard work and application, I know I’ll get close to an approximation of someone who speaks the lingo well. I think…
And, finally, I love living in Berlin. Not Germany, for Berlin most definitely is not Germany, but Berlin. It is one of the world’s great cities, and should be on anybody’s list as a must-see place, and, if you can, try living here, even if only for a while.
Great post, Cathi!
Thanks for your comment, Mark! Yes, the bureaucracy is something you can't even accurately describe, you have to experience it to understand.
I am also struggling with German- but am still plugging away..
Yes, it’s almost like some kind of medieval slow torture, no?
We went through all of this to work at my husband‘s headquarters in Kassel, only for my children and him to not like it and want to come home. I could have stayed forever and every time we go to the doctor or I go grocery shopping I let him know. When we go to Michigan instead of Paris, I let him know. I didn’t even mind everything being closed on Sunday.
Moving to Germany is my secret fear… 😂. I have been married to a German for 25 years but we have lived that entire time in Switzerland so I have zero claim to citizenship (although I bore a German son!). As a Swiss citizen now I would at least get some preferential treatment if we would settle across the border— unlike in the 90s when, as an American, I could not get residency in Germany with a freelance journalist’s contract. I guess I still harbor a grudge!
Nein
Not needing a car and the expenses that entails-no insurance, no repair fees, etc. has to help.
As to universal health coverage-are there long wait times to get appointments to see a doctor?
It depends where you are. In Bavaria/Baden Wuerttemberg, it's general not a long wait. I also have access to several regular doctors if I want to, and can usually get an appointment the same or the next day. For a knee operation, I waited 2 weeks. I got a fancy knee-exercise machine for 6 weeks post-op, a complex knee brace and physio therapy for 12 weeks, all paid for by my health insurance. I can go to the dentist any day, most regular interventions are covered, and the amount I have to pay for things like root canals, crowns, is very reasonable. My bifocal glasses here cost around 500 Euros compared to $1500 CAN I paid for my previous glasses in Canada. There are countless low-cost sports clubs for kids, and yes, the 'Vereine" where youth and kids can do stuff they are interested in.
Germans have high expectations of each other, and generally people strive to meet them. They are often extremely conscientious and try their best to not inconvenience anyone and expect the same from others. Being self-sufficient is really important, to the point of some Germans seeming cold and uncaring about your specific situation. But once they warmed up to you, in other words, once you have proven to them over a longish period of time that you are also meeting those expectaions of honourability, self-sufficiency and are possessing the fine skill of reading between the lines (or into the silences during conversation) and are also fun to be around, they will generously help you however they can. Most Germans seem to have a pretty good bullshit detector though, so you can't pretend to be someone you are not. They don't put any stock in self-presentation. Talking excitedly about your wins will only seem like bragging to them. Understatement proves you are trustworthy. Braggers can't keep secrets, might look flighty or not very smart. Anyhow, just my 2 cents worth:)
Thanks, Alma! That's a good 2 cents!
For specialists, yes. I am not sure if that is more of a Berlin-specific thing, because there is a shortage of doctors-particularly specialists-here. Many of them are older and there aren't enough younger ones showing up to take their place. The same is true of teachers.
We haven't had to wait long to schedule an appointment with our Hauzarzt (primary care doctor) and then all primary care doctors are required to have Sprechstunde, set hours of the day when they take unscheduled urgent appointments.
And, thinking more about it, I should have included something about the health system, since it operates differently than many Americans expect. I will probably do a whole post about this later. But the short version: There is universal coverage. You are required by law to have health insurance and you pay a premium based on your income. You can choose between the public plan that everyone can get, or applying for and paying extra for private health insurance.
Having private insurance will mean that you may be able to get an appointment faster and there are more doctors who will take it.
Even though I don't plan to move to Germany I am finding these insights fascinating. I thought Berlin was digital nomad-friendly but I guess it's more likely to be towards EU citizens who don't require a digital nomad visa? I also feel slightly relieved that here in Ireland apart from specialist medical appointments you don't have waiting lists. Still, even in Ireland there's a lot that can be improved. Congratulations on building a new life in Germany and glad your family has settled in well!
Thanks, Paola!
Yes. It is a totally different picture for citizens of EU member countries. I should have mentioned that.
Maybe the topic for a future post? 😃